The grass is green. Such a simple sentence, but after a winter like the one we just had, a glorious one. Warm temperatures yesterday and a gentle rain overnight had me awakening to an almost startling change in the view outside my window today. Green grass, green fields set off by the red of tight buds forming on tree branches and bushes. Soon, they too will open to reveal leaves of green. Change and promise – the theme for spring, the theme for my life this spring.
My mother will be entering a health care facility on Monday. Lauren’s home is back on track and should be ready by June 1. When both are settled in their respective new homes, their lives and my life will be drastically different. It is hard to imagine what the future will look like. I want to anticipate the months to come eagerly, with joy …and relief. I find it hard, though, to allow myself to get too excited, to hold on to the promise. I’m worried about the other changes to come in all of our lives. Our federal and state governments are trying to deal with a bad economy and an ever-growing need for health and social services. They are trying to pass laws and change policies that will adversely affect the poor, disabled, and elderly. They are making changes to Medicare, Medicaid, and state services. What will this mean in my mother’s life, in Lauren’s, in mine? I wish I could let myself look to change as positive, promising. I wish I could embrace it. I hope that someday the poor, elderly and disabled can look to change with optimism instead of fear.